Friday, October 02, 2015

Dear self, X years ago ...

I came across this wonderful video today where a bunch of folks talk to their slightly younger friends about things that that they wish they had known just a year ago. So the 20 year old says “Dear 18 year old, do not put on so much make-up” while the 28 year old goes “Dear 26 year old, back up your hard-drive now.” I was so thrilled by this video and I thought I could do my own version of this. Since it is very hard to empathize with a 10-year old self as an 11-year old self when I am 26, I am fixing my view-point in my current timeline, so that the story does not have annoying jump cuts.

 “Dear 10-year old – your handwriting does not matter at all. Stop moping that your favorite gel pens were taken off production.”

“Dear 11-year old – do not attend any Tamil weddings even if you are tempted by the live Dosa counters and the limitless possibilities that the buffet line has to offer. The PTSD is not worth it.”

“Dear 12-year old – You can never be tall enough. One day you are going to understand how painful it is to dabble in 4-inch high heels and if some moronic relative cackles with a funny, funny joke about how they have to rebuild their ceilings when you visit them, don’t stand just there and fume in adolescent anger. Try breaking their TV before you leave. 'Tis not vandalism if it is for a good cause.”

“Dear 13-year old. Quizzing is fun but it is not as big as you think it is”

“Dear 14-year old, it is okay if you cannot do two digit multiplications in your head. The rest of your family might not know it, but there are things called calculators and doing Math really fast in head will become as obsolete as having a good handwriting. Actually, scratch this. Instead, avoid all contact with extended family. When they quiz you in Math in social gatherings, tell them to go to hell and add some gory details if possible. You have a morbid imagination. Use it.”

“Dear 15-year old, memories of reading Harry Potter will remain extremely salient all through adult life. Cherish it.”

“Dear 16-year old, no amount of practice tests is going to prevent you from misreading the question in the final board exam. It is three rolls of two dice and not two rolls of three dice. It might bump you down by 500 in the rankings for getting into a good school, but you will do okay with what you get.”

“Dear 17-year old, pay attention in the calculus class. Despite what your seniors say, understanding how to get a Thevenin’s equivalent right is never going to help in life.”

“Dear 18-year old, this year you will have Electrical Engineering laboratory. You would think that all that character building should mean something, but it never will. You will survive even if they kick you out of the lab multiple times. Blown fuses are not your fault. Well, though we both know the truth deep down. If only you had not distracted ...”

“Dear 19-year old, eat all idli from all the restaurants that the splendid city of Coimbatore has to offer. Someday, you will be mortified to unfreeze idlis and dip them in what passes as coconut chutney. You will long for the beet-root chutney at RHR Idli Kadai.”

“Dear 20-year old, IBM is not going to give a free bag that says “I am the chosen one” during recruitment like they did the year before. Stop basing important decisions in your life on free stuff you get at job fairs.”

“Dear 21-year old. Hot chocolate does not mean melted chocolate. It is just a fancy way of saying Bournvita. That does not  justify drinking a whole bottle of Hershey's syrup to deal with the disappointment.”

“Dear 22-year old, this is the first year in life you will begin to know that you cannot always make things happen by working really hard. Actually, this will be the worst and the best time of your life. Remember every day." 

“Dear 23-year old, stuff yourself with Google food. You will only have the memory of such indulgence to carry you through grad school when you are deciding between going hungry and the saddest salad you have ever seen.”

“Dear 24-year old, five cups of coffee is not good for health and not doing dishes for a month is such a terrible idea.”

“Dear 25-year old, do not binge watch Netflix, on your laptop, lying on bed. Your eyes can get remarkably screwed in a very short period of time. Gilmore girls is not even riveting story-telling. Also, do not panic. God works in mysterious ways.”

Check out the video I was watching here .